Life...it really is quite an amazing thing. Mine lately has been busier than usual, but I think I'm handling it okay. I guess today though I just felt like I needed to get some thoughts out. While I would usually do this in the privacy of my journal I wanted to see if anyone has some advice or thoughts on what I'm going through. So here it is:
Just under a month ago I was called to be in the Young Women's as a Beehive Advisor. At first, I was just excited to work with the girls and have fun, but lately I have begun to feel completely inadequate. I never realized how much time was involved with the youth. There are always meetings, and temple trips, girls camp, weekly activities, and so much more. Not only is the time becoming more difficult, but the need to really be strong spiritually has been tough. The ward I'm in has been great in preparing me as I have felt pushed spiritually every week. I always come home from church wanting to be better, and I have begun to understand doctrines and have the desire to study more than ever. Despite this I feel as if I am falling way too short.
Being an example to these girls has become so important. I remember how close I was to my leaders. I didn't know their everyday doings, but they had an influence upon me. I'm not sure what type of influence I want to be for these girls. What can I teach them when I feel as if I still have so much to learn myself? I think I am just now getting out of my stubborn teenage years and humbling myself and allowing myself to understand the true importance of Christ in my life. I guess if the only thing I had to do was prepare myself for this calling I would be okay, but with all I have going on I'm finding it hard to set aside the necessary time.
I don't know...I could probably go on about this subject for much longer, but I won't make you all endure that. :) So, I guess if anybody has some thoughts I would love to hear them.
2 comments:
This all says one thing about you: you're growing and progressing and that's really important. I admire you for it.
Myranda,
I feel inadequate all the time. Maybe it's because being a mom takes so much time. It's hard for me to leave church and even know if I heard anything. We are always our worst critics- I'm sure you are a STELLAR example to those girls.
Something I've decided to try is to pick just one thing that I want to work on at a time so that I don't feel so bombarded with a million things that I need to be better at. I can focus most of my effort on that one thing until I have it down.
Hope this helps. Take care!
Kelli
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